1. Avoid unnecessary details.
1. 避免不必要的细节。

Don’t sidetrack. For example, if the time something happened isn’t important, don’t waste time getting it right.
不要转变话题。比如,如果某事发生的时间不重要,就不要浪费时间纠正了。

2. Don’t ask another question before the first one has been answered.
2. 在第一个问题得到回答前不要问另一个问题。

If you ask how someone’s children are, don’t jump in with your family health before she has answered.
如果你问某人的孩子怎么样,在她回答之前不要插入你的家庭健康问题。


3. Do not interrupt another while he is speaking.
3. 在别人说话时不要打断。

Also, try to make your story short, giving the other person a chance to speak and not interrupt.
而且自己也要尽量长话短说,给他人机会说话并且不要打断。

4. Do not contradict, especially if it’s not important.
4. 不要反驳,特别是在不重要的情况下。

You are inserting unnecessary details into the person’s story. “The person who contradicts, frequently restates the matter in another way.”
你是在那个人的故事中插入不必要的细节。“反驳的人常常以另一种方式重新叙述事件。”

5. Do not do all the talking.
5. 不要只是自己说。

Ask questions to find out what you both have in common.
问问题找出你们两个的共同之处。1

6. Don’t always be the hero of your story, however, the story should have a hero.
6. 不要总是做你故事的主人公,尽管,故事应该有一个主人公。

Build up others as well as yourself.
宣扬自己,也要宣扬别人。1

7. Choose a subject of mutual interest.
7. 选择一个共同感兴趣的话题。

Draw the person’s interests out and don’t “hinge the conversation on politics when it should be on potatoes or on poetry.”
引起那个人的兴趣,不要“在应该谈土豆或诗歌时老是谈政治。”

8. Be a good listener.
8. 做一个好的聆听者。

You will naturally become one if you follow the above rules.
如果你遵循以上规则,你自然会成为一个好的聆听者。

9. The conversation should be in harmony with the surroundings.
9. 谈话应该与环境协调一致。

Do not “talk about cheese when the moon would be a more fitting topic.” Also, don’t discount the appropriateness of silence.
不要“在月亮会是个更适合的话题时谈论奶酪。”而且不要忽视适当的沉默。

10. Do not exaggerate.
10. 不要夸张。

Not everything is “the best,” “the worst,” or “the funniest.”
不是所有的事情都是“最好的”、“最坏的”或“最滑稽的”。

11. Do not misquote.
11. 不要错误地引用。

“Use the quotation for the occasion; do not make an occasion for the quotation.”
“应时机需要而引用,不要为了引用而制造时机。”

12. Cultivate tact.
12. 培养分寸感。

Do not be untruthful, but also don’t feel the need to be hurtful. Do not say someone looks unwell, sick, or tired. This will do nothing to further conversation and only make the person uncomfortable. Don’t hint at it either by asking if she had a long night. Remember silence is an option. “Say the right thing, or say nothing.”
不要不诚实,但也不要觉得有必要造成伤害。不要说某人看起来不舒服、有病或疲惫。这对推进谈话没任何用,仅仅使这个人局促不安。也不要问她是否长夜无眠来暗示。记住可以选择沉默。“说恰当的话,或者什么也不说。”